Kids in Crisis

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Kids in Crisis - Insight Issue 30
Insight Issue 30 - Spring 2005

Handling World Events Here at Home
The proliferation of 24-hour cable networks and growing influence of tabloid journalism mean that world disasters vividly impact the lives of every family, seemingly as soon as they strike. Almost immediately, children begin to ask "why" and seek reassurance; parents struggle to understand and interpret events appropriately. The deadly tsunami is the most recent example of a tragedy we all look to understand and explain.

World events such as this reach deep into Kids in Crisis in ways most of us don't even consider. Studies show that seeing media coverage of world tragedies can create stress for children, even those not directly impasted by the disaster. For children whose lives are already filled with uncertainty, trying to grapple with and process the chaos of a disaster can significantly heighten anxiety. In most homes, parents are the source of comfort, but what about those children whose parents are not with them?

Trained extensively in dealing with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) as well as a wide range of crisis situations, the clinical staff of Kids in Crisis knows that children staying at our two homes, particularly those at the Teen House, require additional attention and sensitivity during the aftermath of major disasters. "Because of what they have already been through, our kids need extra assuance about their safety. For the younger kids, whose media exposure is more limited, we work to expand their feelings of safety, asknowledging their reactions and explaining why a disaster here is more of a remote possibility," notes Denise Qualey, Managing Director, Crisis Services. "With our older kids, they often need someone to talk to about why calamities of such magnitude can happen, more of the theological aspects of a disaster. In both cases, we know we need to be here, to be able to listen effectively and comfort them in an age-appropriate manner."

Therapeutic Programs Expand
Pilot Programs Start at the Teen House
Weekends have a different feel at the Teen and Crisis Nursery homes at Kids in Crisis. While weekdays are like most homes, with children rushing to and from activities, handling chores and getting ready for dinner, hours on the weekends often stretch longer. On Saturdays and Sundays, our counseling staff works hard to offer a more creative routine, focusing more on fun and personal interests.

That's where two new therapeutic recreation programs are coming into play - literally - at the Kids in Crisis Teen House. In January, two new leisure programs were introduced to the kids: art therapy and pet therapy. Already, the two programs are a huge hit; Kids in Crisis will seek funding to continue this experience for the teens and to expand it to include the children at the Crisis Nursery later this year.

The Brooklyn-based Good Dog Foundation uses professionally trained volunteers and animals to aid the healing process in humans and improve their quality of life. Volunteer teams of owners and dogs visit KIC on Saturday mornings, allowing kids to regularly play with and care for dogs. "It's amazing to see what impact the dogs have on our kids," says Craig Haen, the Clinical Program Director who worked with the Good Dog team in a previous position and introduced the program to KIC. "While the cuddling and caring is a huge element of the process, kids often use the time with the pets to begin to open up about relationships and loss in a way we don't see otherwise. It allows us to talk about these critical issues differently. It's just and inspiring program. Our goal with these programs - and others we have on the drawing board - is to give kids another outlet for their emotions and have fun in the process," says Haen.

Creative expression moves from faces to fingers when the bi-weekly art therapy program gets underway at the Teen House on Sundays. Facilitated by artist Mandy Weil, a recent graduate of the therapy program at the Art Institute of Chicago, the 12-week Open Studio Art Therapy program is providing KIC children ages 12 and up with the opportunity to express difficult emotions and find a way to tap into their creative energies. Three-hour sessions, supervised by Mandy and KIC staff, teach simple art making techniques and encourage kids to cultivate a sense of ownership and responsibility.

According to Mandy, the Open Studio Program, created in 1991 works for three key reasons. "First, adults work alongside the children. There is no forced participation. Second, kids can choose to share their work, or not. They decide how much to reveal and that freedom of choice brings a greater sense of safety and confidence. Finally," adds Mandy, "no criticism is allowed. No one is allowed to comment in any way on the art shared in the group. When the atmosphere is safe, the kids can go deeply into emotional territories where they otherwise might not go and face them in ways that far surpass their verbal abilities. They almost always surprise themselves. And when they don't comment, they are surprised at what they learn to hear." Following the program's end in late spring, Mandy and KIC staff plan to host an exhibition of the kids' work in the living areas of the Teen House. "The excitement and validation that comes from seeing your work displayed can't be underestimated," says Mandy. "I know that people who see the art will be struck by the insightful sense of hope and resiliency that many of us fail to recognize."

Creative Ways To Give
It's universal: time is at a premium. Kids in Crisis knows that there are many people in our communities who want to volunteer to help with our programs but, because of family and work obligations, aren't able to make a regular, long-term commitment.

There's no guilt trip here. We can put your volunteer aspirations to work in a way that works for you. There are plenty of creative possibilities for volunteering at Kids in Crisis - one time or many times. We're happy to team with you to develop a meaningful volunteer opportunity that fits your schedule. Consider the following ideas or use them to spur your own thinking:

Pizza and movie night. We'd love a volunteer or family to drop off pizzas and age-appropriate movies on a Friday or Saturday night once a month...once a quarter...once a year...take your pick.

Food for thought. Would you cook an easy dinner for one of our two homes? Our counselors can always use a break from cooking (more time for homework help). Think about coming in and preparing dinner for the children or, if it's easier, pre-arrange to drop off dinner for those staying at the Nursery or Teen House.

Organize a "drive." Have your church, school or office help collect art supplies or toiletry items for our residents.

Do you have new tote bags or duffle bags going unused at your house? We need new bags so children leaving Kids in Crisis have something to carry their clothes and personal items in.

Are you the birthday fairy? A few volunteers are needed to provide the makings of a birthday party for the kids in the Nursery. Funny hats, paper goods and a cake is all it takes when one of the children staying with us has a birthday.

How about a night out? Like all kids, ours love to bowl, go to the movies or have a meal out. Accompanied by our counselors, you could treat a group to a favorite activity.

Of course, even these things take time. But you can be a part of Kids in Crisis through creative donations, as well. For example:
*Tickets. Do you have tickets to area theatres or a sporting event that you can't use? Think about donating them to KIC for use by our kids. It's a huge treat for them.
*Gift cards. Gift cards to area bookstores or clothing stores mean our kids can shop - to celebrate a birthday, a special occasion or simply to be like every other kid.
*Job Search. Do you own an area business? We're always on the lookout for work opportunities for KIC kids. A part-time or summer job can help instill a sense of responsibility and boost self-esteem for our teens.

An hour...an evening...an event. All can make a difference for a child at Kids in Crisis. If you are interested in any of these ideas or want help creating your own plan, please call Jamie Dorman at 203-622-6556 or email Jdorman@kidsincrisis.org.

I Want to Be a Counselor
by Jessica Bilhuber, Age 7
When I grow up, I want to be a counselor at Kids in Crisis. At Christmas, my dad wanted to bring toys to Kids in Crisis, so I went with him. A man had all the other people's bags of gifts in his car. He said we could go inside and look. So, we listened to him and went inside. On the porch outside, I saw my uncle's name on the wall, because he used to work there a long time ago. When I got older, he died, so it was nice to see his name on the wall because he was on e of the best helpers. Then we went inside, and we saw all the toys and the Christmas tree and a big, long table with lots of chairs. It was dirty on the table because the children had made cookies or played with play-doh. I went upstairs and there were painted hands on the wall and words that told all about life at Kids in Crisis. Then we went all the way upstairs and saw the bedrooms. The boys' bedrooms looked boyish, and the girls' bedrooms looked better. I don't know why.

I remember that long table and that it looked like so much fun and the bedrooms and the couch with all the toys on it, and they looked fun. I want to help teenagers. If I help babies they might pee on me, and I don't want that. Teenagers are already trained, so they don't wear diapers. The kids are there because their mom or dad might be mean to them. The teenagers might have lived on the street and didn't have a home before.

I like kids in Crisis because it makes me happy. I would like to have fun helping teenagers. I think that teenagers might need help with listening more. I would watch them all the time just in case they don't listen, and I would remind them that I'm watching them.

New Staff, New Perspectives
A Fresh Look Inside KIC

In recent months, four new professionals have joined the clinical staff at Kids in Crisis, working directly with the families and children who turn to the agency for crisis counseling and temporary shelter. After they settled in, we visited with the team to get their take on the issues facing Connecticut's children, Kids in Crisis and their goals for the agency and its children

Craig Haen, Clinical Program Director of the Teen House, joined KIC following three years at Cornell Medical Center in Westchester, where he coordinated group therapy programs for a psychiatric inpatient unit. During his time there, Craig co-authored a just-published book, "Clinical Applications of Drama Therapy in Child and Adolescent Treatment."

His counter part in the Crisis Nursery, Kristen VanderStucken, came to KIC via Boston, bringing diverse experiences in positions with residential and trauma programs at a leading Boston area hospital. Additionally, Kristen served as Youth Services Counselor for Westwood Youth and Family Services. Her initial challenge at KIC? "Settling in amongst Yankee fans...I still cheer for the Red Sox."

Working with Craig and Kristen are two new social workers, Elizabeth Murdoch, M.S.W. and Lorna Benton, M.S.W. Elizabeth is a longtime area resident who signed on at KIC following graduation from New York University. Lorna, originally from Westchester, joined following stints in shelter care in Oregon and in child advocacy and community mental health in Colorado. "I have a propensity for Moving east with each job I take," she says.

Big Doings for Kids in Crisis
Strap on your dancing shoes for two big fundraising events this spring, both benefitting Kids in Crisis. On Saturday, April 30, KIC supporters will meet in Ridgefield for "Have a Heart," a bi-annual affair held at the Ridgefield Community Center. This year's festivities, expected to draw more than 200 area residents, will be centered around a Kentucky Derby theme, with music, mint juleps, and a first-time-event: a night at the races.

And when the night is over, don't put away those boogie shoes yet. Two weeks later, on Saturday, May 14, is the annual Kids in Crisis "hoedown" celebration, this year entitled "Hoedown goes to the Orient." With the tents awash in luscious silks, rich lacquers, flickering lanterns and bamboo groves, it's a night that will transport one and all to the tantalizing world of the Far East...right here in Greenwich.

For ticket information on both events, contact Cheryl Colucci at Kids in Crisis at 203-6226556 or via e-mail at ccolucci@kidsincrisis.org.

The Givers Will Receive
April 1 kicks off the call for applications for the second annual Kids in Crisis "Tony Award," recognizing an individual or group that has shown unparalleled vision, passion and unselfish commitment to the children of Southwestern Connecticut.

The Kids in Crisis "Tony Award" in named in honor of community leader E.H. "Tony" Brown, whose tireless work for more than two decades supported the diverse needs of Connecticut's children. A former Chairman of the Board of Kids in Crisis, Mr. Brown helped direct the agency's growth and expansion, including the development of the Teen House and Crisis Nursery. Tony was an avid supporter of Kids in Crisis from its founding in 1978 until his death in April, 2002.

"We were truly blessed to have had the support and involvement of Tony Brown," says Shari Shapiro. "Fortunately there are many other 'Tonys' out there. They are the people who are tireless volunteers, with incredible dedication, who show the world that to build strong communities we must make time for and support all of our neighbors in need."

Ann Martin, the first recipient of the Tony Award, said that the award has special significance because of Tony's commitment. "All of us involved with KIC - and volunteers in general - don't look for glory. It's not what drives us. What does drive us is a passion for the work we are doing and a fundamental belief in the work. Nobody embodied this spirit more than Tony Brown. To be recognized for that level of passion is an honor."

Kids in Crisis Tony Award nominations are limited to 500 words and asp sponsors to:

Describe the nominee's accomplishments/achievements in helping Connecticut's children and how the nominee reflects passion, vision, unselfish commitment and leadership qualities;
Explain how the nominee shows creativity in surmounting obstacles;
Provide an anecdote that illustrates the nominee's leadership style.

Applications must be received by June 1, 2005 and will be judged by a committee including Tony's three children and Ms. Martin, as well as members of the Kids in Crisis Board of Directors and staff. The winner of the Kids in Crisis Tony Award will be presented with his or her award at the annual meeting of Kids in Crisis, to be held this Fall.